Statement about Exurb1a

Statement about Exurb1a

Alex(ander) McKechnie, also known as youtuber Exurb1a, is a high-functioning narcissist and sociopath. Alex has an obsession with death and suicide which is translated into his fetish for women who cry, are mentally unstable or suicidal. Alex gaslights, manipulates and abuses women to make them unstable for his own sexual gratification. Everything in this statement is the truth and my experience and impression of Alex, and I will repeat and have repeated it in a court of law. I’ve found out I’m not his only victim and I will not stay silent.

Confession of Alex on Skype in 2016 about his attraction for women with ‘severe mental issues’.

Table of contents:

  1. Clarification and revised statement

  2. In a nutshell: the court case and timeline

  3. Backstory

    1. Exurb1a’s psychological abuse and mental issues

    2. Assault, rape, blackmail & threats


Clarification and Revised Statement

Example of a Dutch article in which the word ‘abuse’ is used to refer to child sexual abuse.

I have clarified the statement since some people have maliciously taken my words out of context. English is not my native language, and some wording I used in the past apparently didn’t make sense to some people.

For example, in the beginning I would regularly use the word ‘abuse’ to refer to sexual assault. In Dutch, sexual abuse is often referred to as ‘misbruik’ which literally translates into ‘abuse’. Abuse has also in English been classified as a word to refer to sexual abuse/rape, but many people don’t seem to know this.

Furthermore, I have referred to the second sexual assault as ‘intimacy almost happened’ in the past, which again got lost in translation. In Dutch, ‘ongewenste intimiteiten’ is used to refer to ‘unwanted intimate acts’ or abuse, especially relating to someone you know or work with (not a stranger). I have now clarified my statement accordingly.
— Pieke Roelofs

Conversation between Alexander McKechnie (Exurb1a) and myself, on November 11 2016, about the first rape that happened in October 2016. In the conversation I describe vaginal bleeding as a result of the first rape, and Alex apologises for what happened.

In a nutshell: The Court Case And Timeline

Hi. If you happened to find this blog and have no idea what's going on: I'm Pieke. Friends call me Pie. I'm an autistic artist from the Netherlands who worked together with youtuber Exurb1a in 2016, and am currently taking him to court for the crimes he committed against me.

I've filed criminal complaints and a witness statement against my former co-worker Alex (Exurb1a) in the Netherlands for:

  • Two accounts of sexual assault (rape)

  • One account of physical assault

  • Multiple accounts of blackmail and threats

  • Trying to influence a witness of a crime (me) through coercion, threats and blackmail to not testify against an offender (him)

  •  Stalking, harassment, defamation, libel and slander

  • Attempting to drive someone (me) to suicide

My case has become an international legal drama because Alex lives in Bulgaria but is from the UK, and I live in the Netherlands.

Alex has refused to voluntarily make a statement to the police for almost 2 years now.

He has known for over 8 months the police in two different countries have been looking for him to question him about the case against him, but can’t find him.

In total, 11 shock-witnesses have decided to testify against Alex and have provided their testimonies to court.

A total of 11 people have decided to testify against Exurb1a. The majority of these witnesses knew about the first rape that happened in October 2016, before Alex raped me again in December 2016 while I was hospitalised and drugged on prescription medication. Alex at this point didn’t know I had told a number of people already about the abuse.

Timeline:

  • October 2016: First assault and rape

  • October 2016: Within 24 hours I spoke with the first shock witness over phone and text about the abuse. This person reached out to me hours after I was raped because a mutual friend of our had died my suicide and they were informing me about it. After they told me about this, I told them what happened with Alex.

  • October 2016: Within days spoke I spoke to multiple other shock witnesses over text and phone about the abuse. These shock-witnesses have provided their testimonies to court. They range from family members to close friends to internet friends I had known for +10 years but never met.

  • October 2016: I recorded the break-up conversation between Exurb1a and myself the moment he started denying his manipulative and aggressive behaviour. Some of the abuse is discussed in it. Alex didn’t know I recorded this conversation; he was however aware I regularly recorded out communication because I had been working on a documentary about our collaboration, and he gave me permission months before to do so. Meaning, the recorded conversation is legally obtained and evidence in the court case.

  • November 2016: I flew back to Bulgaria to attempt to file a police report against Exurb1a. Due to a language barrier, I failed to file a report with the police. I communicated this to multiple witnesses who have testified this to court.

Conversation between one of the shock-witnesses and myself in November 2018. Full conversation I cannot release right now due to my court case.

  • November 2016: Exurb1a found out I wanted to file a report with the police. He was very upset about this and asked me to at least go to dinner with him to talk because he ‘had some things to say’. I accepted because at this point we were still publicly working together and I assumed he wanted to apologise. I agreed to meet him at a public location. While we walked to the restaurant, he took me into an isolated alley. I didn’t like this and asked how much longer until we were near the restaurant and said I didn’t feel comfortable walking in a secluded space. He remarked that ‘Fox and some friends were waiting to kill me’ down the street. Fox is one of his friends whom he referred to as a ‘real sociopath’. I stopped. When Alex saw I was scared, he said it had been ‘a joke’ and that the restaurant was around the corner. He mocked me for thinking he was threatening to have me killed. I went along and it turned out the restaurant was around the corner indeed. During dinner, Exurb1a manipulated me not to press charges, not knowing I had told multiple shock-witnesses about the rape and assault and that I was going to the police. Exurb1a later in January 2017 in a recorded conversation denied I tried to go to the police completely, which proves he’s a liar. I cannot make public yet how Exurb1a manipulated me to not press charges due to my court case.

  • November-December 2016: Blackmail and threats from Exurb1a

  • November 23 2016: I had an ultrasound in the hospital and found out I had a miscarriage as a result of rape.

  • November 24: I was hospitalised with Acute Stress Disorder, Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, Depression and being suicidal.

  • December 2016: Second sexual assault in the Netherlands, while I was hospitalised and was drugged on prescription medication. I was allowed to leave the hospital under companionship at this point. Alex manipulated, threatened and blackmailed me so I would leave the hospital to meet him.

  • December 2016: I spoke with two shock-witnesses within 5 minutes after the second sexual assault. One of these shock-witnesses saw me outside screaming to Alex. In the days after, I told multiple other shock witnesses what happened.

  • January 2017: In a recorded conversation Exurb1a denies the October abuse as well as the December abuse. He also denies I tried going to the police while he knew I went to the police, failed to file a report, after which he manipulated me not to attempt it again. In the call Exurb1a threatened me and attempted to frame me, not knowing at this point 11 shock-witnesses already knew about the October abuse, I had recorded the break-up conversation from October where we discussed the October abuse, and had multiple shock-witnesses who knew I had tried to file a police report already against him.

  • January 2017- October 2017: Exurb1a started to use anonymous accounts to spread lies about me and target me. He was called out for manipulating his own subreddit; he deleted topics linking to the evidence against him, but kept comments that were smearing my name and spreading lies about me online. Reddit eventually had to intervene.

  • In the summer of 2017 I attempted to take my own life due to the targeted harassment.

  • When the #MeToo movement happened in 2017, I started gaining public support.

  • Exurb1a has been stalking me and my friends since November 2016.

The first shock-witness I spoke to after the first rape, I spoke within 24 hours after the rape, in October 2016. I spoke with this shock-witness (an internet friend) via text and phone, and all evidence has been provided to court, and this person has written a detailed statement. He’s someone I have never physically met in my life, making him an important shock-witness. The second and third shock-witness I spoke to were other close friends, whom I detailed the abuse within days of it happening.

Hundreds of fans and public people at this point have requested Exurb1a to make a statement about the situation, but he has refused and has never spoken out publicly about the case.

I cannot reveal all my evidence or everything that happened due to my court case - but I’m making enough publicly available to warn people about this man. Revealing what I’m revealing already puts my legal case in danger and has resulted in death threats, but I decided to do this because I consider this man a dangerous psychopath and people have a right to know who he is.

Exurb1a finding it 'hurtful' I vocalised to him how he abused me. This is what Exurb1a did every time when he was abusive: also in this case. He tried to play victim and shame me for the fact that he raped and assaulted me.

Conversation about the rape, in November 2016, where I talk about the vaginal bleeding as a result of rape, three months before Exurb1a denied everything (captured on video).

Backstory

Youtuber Wendover Productions wanted to give me money for staying silent about his contributions.

I used to work with Alex (Exurb1a). His fans even paid him (and me at the end of 2016 for our collaboration) to work with me. Alex used funding from his fans to collaborate with me, which he used for example for plane-tickets to visit me.

After we started working together we also started dating (serious enough for him to meet my family and for me to meet his). He was unknown around the time, but soon after he got more attention on youtube. The more attention he got, the more abusive he became to me. It started with psychological abuse and gaslighting and eventually escalated in physical and sexual abuse, blackmail, harassment, violent threats and stalking.

Alex and I worked together on a podcast (Half Drunk and Curious), I was working on a documentary about our collaboration, and there were plans for making a film together. I appeared in one of his videos and he used me to provide him tools for his own productions, which I happily provided or brought to Bulgaria when he requested it, while we were still working together.

Alex would run all his videos by me, asked my advice, and overall relied heavily on me. The more famous he got, the more he started requesting my opinion and approval regarding his work. He became abusive if I wouldn’t give him the attention he needed, eventually causing me to attempt to slowly put up my boundaries and address his needy and aggressive behaviour, which only caused him to become more hostile and aggressive towards me, and talk about suicide as well.

Alex and I met through Youtube.

He had 2500 subscribers when we met, and I had around 10.000 subscribers on my PhotoandGrime youtube channel (I have multiple youtube channels, anonymously, this was just the public one I used to work together with him). 

Exurb1a’s psychological abuse and mental issues

The more attention Exurb1a received online, the more 'stressed' he became about it, and the more abusive he started to behave towards me. Initially, the abuse started as verbal and mental abuse. He called me bitch, cunt, hussy and whore for no reason, while at the same time saying things like he loved me and might wanted to have kids with me some day. When I tried to communicate to him I didn't like being called names, he tried to justify it, as you can see in the conversation below.

Pattern of the abuser: When an abuser doesn't like your behaviour, he or she will (subtly) punish you and make you feel bad for your 'mistake'. In this case, Exurb1a didn't like that I didn't like him calling me horrible names. So first he tries to justify this, and when I keep insisting that I still don't like it, he becomes 'short'. It's a subtle way of punishing someone: through ignoring them or being short to them. In the conversation you can see me trying to 'make-up' for going against my abuser by saying something 'sweet'. This is typical abuse done by people with narcissistic personality disorder.

Alex has an obsession with suicide and death. He told me that he knew he was going to die by suicide one day. Many nights when he was suicidal, I tried to comfort him and bring him back to reality. This became incredibly stressful for me.

He also told me early on he had an attraction to women with severe mental issues. I didn’t really pay attention to this comment in the beginning until I started noticing it seemed to turn him on if I cried and he started gaslighting me. He seemed to enjoy to lie to me, manipulate me, and confuse me, and would get sexually turned on by it.

Another victim of him got in touch with me in December 2018, stating a similar experience with him. This victim is too afraid to come forward but described him as a “pathological liar and sociopath” who enjoys making women “unstable” through psychological abuse. According to this victim, she noticed as well that when she was upset because how he treated her, he would be sexually stimulated due to it.

Exurb1a’s confession about his fetish for women with ‘severe mental issues’.

Alex/Exurb1a has severe psychological issues. He refused to take medication for his hallucinations and psychosis. He told me he dealt with it by abusing drugs and alcohol and that it helped. Only later I found out it actually made his illness worse.

I told him multiple times to get help, find a psychologist etc, but he was not interested in that. He said I helped him by being there for him.

Exurb1a talking about his mental problems: sleepwalking and hallucinations. Exurb1a quit medication prescribed for his problems, and resorted to drugs and alcohol to deal with his issues. Confessions of this I have as well. While abusing alcohol, Exurb1a assaulted and raped me the first time.

In a deleted Reddit post which was recovered in 2018 with the WayBackMachine, you can see Exurb1a talk on his own reddit account ‘exurbia’ about his mental issues, and that he broke into a house once and police found him.

In other words, Exurb1a knew (in 2012 already) he could get more psychotic and dangerous as a result of abusing alcohol. Meaning, the crimes he committed against me while he was drunk, could be punished tougher in a court of law, because of serious neglect on his part to protect those around him from his psychosis.

A Reddit post Exurb1a tried to cover up. It was discovered and recovered in 2018.


Evidence of Exurb1a stalking me and my Twitter Friends. Exurb1a accidentally followed a twitter friend of mine in 2018, a year after she publicly tweeted about him and me in 2017 and called him out.


Exposed: youtuber Exurb1a is a rapist and abuser.

Exposed: Exurb1a's alcohol abuse, love-bombing and online rape jokes between his friends after he raped me, and more.

Days after the first assault. Exurb1a trying to ignore the abuse and trying to manipulate me to stay silent and to not go to the police or press charges. I asked Exurb1a to make a statement together with me to address why I quit working with him. Exurb1a refused. This is one of the many text messages between us that will be used in court. Unfortunately I cannot make them all public as of now due to my court case.

Assault, Rape, Threats, Blackmail

I was hospitalised on November 24 2016 after suffering a miscarriage as a result of rape after a series of events that happened between my ex coworker Exurb1a and I.

I was sexually and physically assaulted by Exurb1a the month before, in October 2016, while he was drunk.

Speaking the truth is not slander and not punishable by law. Anything I'm sharing here, including evidence, I'm sharing as a fair comment on a public person (which is not punishable by law).

I was voluntarily hospitalised on a psychiatric ward for depression, Acute Stress Disorder and Post Traumatic Stress Disorder a day after I had an ultrasound in the hospital and found out I had a miscarriage. I was hospitalised for 3 months, and then transferred to the hospital's hostel in the city: an in-between place before going home. I spent 7 months in hospital total.

While writing this (it's May 3 2017), I am still inside the hostel, and am still not home yet. I've been inside the system for almost 6 months now, working towards going home, to my son. My parents have been taking care of my autistic 7 year old son since November. He's doing very well. I still have full custody of my son, and see him a couple of times a week, and soon my son and I will be together again: currently I'm getting the house we will move in ready for us to live in, while getting treatment for depression and PTSD as a result of rape. I’ve established no-contact with my abuser. One of the reasons why I decided to slowly speak out, is so I could first recover. Especially because people started sending me death-threats and told me to kill myself etc. I wanted to be more mentally stable before addressing everything Exurb1a had done to me, so I could protect myself better from negative backlash. 


Back to being committed. After Exurb1a assaulted and raped me, we broke up. He refused to go to the police with me, and manipulated me not to file a police report. I cannot make public how he did this, only after the court case. I told Exurb1a I didn’t want to work with him anymore, which made him angry.

When Exurb1a found out I miscarried in November 2016 and was hospitalised, he told me he would come over right away to check if I was okay.

After saying this he didn't contact me again for 12 days, leaving me to rot inside the hospital, after rape and abuse, and a miscarriage. I didn't contact him either at this time: I told him where I was, what hospital, and then said I was going offline and that the ball was in his court because I was not going to make any effort anymore and he had to apologise for everything he had done.

After 12 days of him not contacting me either and not visiting, I realised what he had done: he had bought himself time. He had manipulated me not to press charges and then ghosted me. After 12 days, I called him out for what he had done.

While I was hospitalised and suicidal, Exurb1a harassed and bullied me for hours on Skype and phone, for days, because I called him out. Eventually his harassment caused me to call him out personally on Twitter, in the hope he'd stop if I publicly called him out. I told him I would speak out against him. He then threatened and blackmailed me to keep quiet after I tweeted about it, otherwise he'd release half-truths, lies and personal information about me. He said he would tell people I used drugs around my child for example, which is a blatant lie. He also said he would tell people I had been blackmailing him, which again, is a blatant lie. This all happened in an audio conversation on Skype. Before this conversation started, you can see the message leading up to this conversation: his threat to make a 'statement'.

Exurb1a never released his so called 'statement' filled with lies. This was merely a threat to keep me silent.

Given I was hospitalised and barely had internet access, this was a serious threat to the safety of my son and me. If he would spread lies about me saying I used drugs around my child, I could have child protective services called on me, and loose my child. This caused me to take my tweets offline as he wanted to, and I disappeared offline for 6 weeks (Someone replying to my original tweet).

Eventually, as a result of me staying quiet, Exurb1a became 'polite' again. He told me that he still loved me. I told him I didn't love him anymore after what he had done. He seemed angry about this. Exurb1a wanted to talk. He coerced me to see him and talk to him. He came over to visit me in December 2016 in the hospital, after first leaving me to rot in there for a month after he abused me, and I had a miscarriage. He claimed he wanted to 'apologise'. Due to his threats and blackmail, and being medically drugged by the doctors, I allowed him to visit because I was scared. I figured as long as I would do what he wanted, he wouldn’t spread lies about me to thousands of his fans, and I had time to gather more evidence against him.

While he came over, he threatened me in a sophisticated and subtle way. When I told him couldn't be his friend anymore if I couldn't trust him, his response was (no joke) "Did you know I once set fire to a woman's computer?"

When I was horrified by this comment and repeated it back to him, he said he didn't say that. He said it was a man's computer instead. (As if this was a correct response to me saying I couldn't be his friend anymore?) He was gaslighting me. He seemed fascinated to see how I responded to it, in a cruel and sadistic way.

A month later, he denied the story completely, and said it had ‘just been just a rumour’. During this conversation he also denied everything that happened, and he tried to frame me. I recorded this conversation.

When Exurb1a visited in December, I was very confused, scared and upset. He took me out of the hospital for a few hours to talk (I was voluntarily committed and allowed to leave the hospital with companionship as long as I was back at 8 in the evening), and had just received a higher dose of medication to deal with my anxiety, so I didn't feel well. 

Looking back, meeting him was extremely stupid, and the hospital should have never allowed me to come along with him. Why?

Because what happened during one of the talks (we had two), is something he later used as blackmail against me as well.

I had a full-blown panic attack while we were sitting in his room to talk, in front of him.  This happened shortly after he threatened me. I had taken a Xanax (alprazolam) to battle the panic attack. Xanax is classified as a rape-drug. It can cause slurred speech, drowsiness, poor balance or coordination and muscle weakness.

During the panic attack I went through hyperventilation, crying, shaking, the whole thing. Exurb1a tried to calm me down, and during this moment, he held me, after he had just threatened me when I told him I couldn’t be his friend anymore. While I was still crying, during this horrible moment when he held me close because nobody else was there and I was freaking out, this almost became ‘intimate’, while I was crying. It wasn’t intimate in the sense of I wanted it. It was intimate in the sense of physical contact: Exurb1a started touching me. It was in fact sexual assault, because I could not consent because I was drugged (which Exurb1a knew). Exurb1a knew I didn’t want to be with him anymore, and he had raped me weeks earlier. I described this in the past as ‘intimacy almost happened’ and ‘abuse’ while I was drugged, but I’ve come to realise that many people take this out of context and do not understand the severity of what I was describing of what happened.

I was drugged. This man had threatened and blackmailed me. I could not consent to anything that was happening. Furthermore, I was crying.

We didn't kiss or have sex. He touched me while I cried. I didn’t touch him at any point.

Exurb1a started touching me everywhere, while I was crying. He raped me with his fingers while I was crying and drugged. He then stopped on his own accord, I left the place completely unstable and crying, and ran across the street to my friends who lived there. I told them exactly what happened.

Not much later, Exurb1a used what happened against me in a phone call in January: he said I had been lying about the abuse and was just saying it to get at him. He said I tried to have sex with him when he came to visit, so the abuse before couldn't have happened.

I recorded the conversation with my Ipad. I knew he was recording the conversation due to the way he was asking questions, and that he was trying to make me angry and admit we ‘almost got intimate’ which again, for me, was sexual assault.

He avoided answering anything related to him, but tried to push me into talking about the event that happened on the night we almost ‘got intimate’ (again, sexual assault). 

When he came over, he also tried to bribe me with the podcast we started. He wanted to continue to work with me (so I would stay quiet). Around this time I finally started to realise how manipulative he was, and how sick the games he'd been playing with me actually were. I knew I had to break free from him in order to escape his blackmail and harassment, and had to prevent him from being able to blackmail me further.

Therefore, I spoke out against him online again after going offline for those 6 weeks and after he visited, to break his power over me: so he couldn't continue to blackmail me anymore. 

The moment I spoke out, he stayed completely silent online and even started censoring his own subReddit so people wouldn't find out about what he had done to me. As it turns out, his threats and blackmail from before were all bluff, and he has now decided to pretend nothing has happened. By doing so and staying silent online, he's trying to make me look like someone who's lying and screaming for attention, while I'm not speaking out for fun: I felt forced to speak out to protect myself from Exurb1a. Also, I'm speaking the truth. 

If you know Exurb1a, you probably know he's a 'smart' man. If you know Exurb1a personally, you probably also know he can be quite charming. Being smart and charming doesn't equal being a good person though, as I found out myself. If you doubt me, please keep in mind, that smart and charming people can do clever things to manipulate people too, to hide their true intentions and the truth. Especially if they want to save their own arse and think their career is on the line. A fame-obsessed and money-hungry person like my ex, might go as far as harassing a hospitalised and suicidal patient to keep her quiet, after she miscarried his child, after he abused and blackmailed her. That's what happened in my case. To make it worse, Exurb1a even met my autistic son whom he knew I have to care for. However, he felt no shame in trying to de-stabilise me even further with fear and threats of character assassination, and play into my suicidality while I was hospitalised, just so he could save himself and hide from the truth. 

The worst things Exurb1a has done or said to me I was not able to capture, so any evidence I'm presenting, is not the worst he's done to me. Keep that in mind.

If you are a family member or friend of Exurb1a, or other YouTuber, there's a chance that in my full statement, you might find yourself mentioned in this (I won't mention last names or show pictures).

Exurb1a regularly talked very bad about people, or admitted to me how he used people (especially women) to get things done. In my statement I'm including his manipulating and leeching lifestyle also with evidence, to back up my story as to why you should be careful around him, and why he's a wolf in sheep's clothing. I've decided to keep the first names private of people who are easily identifiable. For example, a woman Exurb1a regularly used (and still uses), who had an abortion at 12, and has a unique first name. Obviously due to this information being shared also by him in the evidence I'm going to show, I decided to keep her name private for example, because in case she reads it, she'll know it's about her anyway. For other people who might find out how Exurb1a talked about them and are angry or hurt; if you want to talk to me about it, feel free to reach out. A handful of people who know Exurb1a personally have been reaching out to me already. Unfortunately I can't share everything they told me because I promised I wouldn't, but they'd probably tell you that I'm willing to listen, and won't share anything publicly you share with me (unless you don't mind).
 


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This article has been last updated in January 2019.

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